Thursday

TriStarr in Lancaster called me. I've an appointment with them on Tuesday, 7/29. I may stay over at Oddity's that night (which will make up for not seeing him this weekend).

Also, a lawyer here in york (leader heights) called and asked if I was interested in being a legal assistant. Am I? FUCKING HELL YEA! but I need to be able to drive!!!!

I hope this means things are looking up. I hate to have to make a decision on what to take and what to say no to, but I'm interested in everything right now and I'll make my choice based on salary considerations - because THAT is the key to living on my own, whether it's in York or Lancaster. I WILL drive by end of August; I will take my test. So if I have to stay in York for at least another year, at least the onus of travel is not on Oddity or anyone else. And anyway, I've friends here I should tighten my ties to.

Lancaster is a nice dream, and if I can make more money there, then I'll choose that. But no, I shan't be moving in with Oddity until my own crap is resolved. That stuff leaves scar tissues that are hard to overcome.

Wednesday

Bored at work. we're sorta caught up. I am applying for jobs in Lancaster, though I'm really just wishing that some jobs come through here in York first.

Heard that the governor of Puerto Rico is chummy with Chavez et al. Now, while I really have no beef with Chavez of Venezuela - there's a need for his sort of leadership in South and Central America, despite his anti-US rhetoric - that the leader of a US commonwealth be friends with this fellow (who has done SHIT for the island) is simply below stupid. It's imbecilic.

Puerto Rico, wake up. Let bygones be bygones and ally yourself with your friend, supporter, neighbor and family to the North. Become a freaking state already! Stop playing these stupid games with your people and the rabblerousers of SA and CA. It's not worth it.

Hard times ahead for the home of my immediate ancestors.

Now if only someone could explain why corruption seems to be inherent in every spanish country government existing.

Heavy big awesome thunderstorm last night. I was awaken from a solid, AdvilPM induced sleep with the brightest flash and loudest boom I'd ever felt. I wasn't sure if the prickling of my skin was due to electrical discharge or just plain FEAR. So, second night of not sleeping a full night. I'm SO going to bed early tonight.

My youngest wants to make me see she's not staying at the residential facility for more than 30 days. I know what she'll do and she'll be released and go to NY and she will FALL FLAT ON HER FACE after hitting that wall of FAIL and then she'll end up in jail again.

My son wants to go to NY but every time he tells me this he back off and then asks me when there's no money and he's frantic. I get so mad at them. (UPDATE) he called me at a quarter to 4 to tell me he's passed his piss test. He goes to MEPS this week and gets his bootcamp shipout date sunday. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Rainy day. Oddity is at the beach with his mom. He loves me. Is that strong enough to get through the rest of the winter, and my job and apartment hunt, and the various crises my children will drop on me? We'll see.

Tuesday

Oddity goes to vacation with his mom this week. He'll be in another state, relaxing in the sun. While I wish I could be with him, the entire concept of 'vacation' seems anathema to me; I need to be able to take off the days I need throughout the month, not hoard them for a week of frantic relaxation.

I prefer mental health days, holidays, sick days and personal days. If I could get that AND a string of vacation days, yea. But... I just don't do the vacation days thing.

Now, if only I could work the way I want to - evening hours, in an office without air conditioning, and you can make up time at will. That would be nice...

I'm gonna miss Oddity this week. I'll see him Monday or Tuesday.

My son is still battling his stupid past; he is trying to clean his urine for the MEPS and I'm betting he did more than he told me he did. Stupid stupid boy. I dont get this drug thing at all.

My youngest was transferred to the residential facility today, I hope. I brought over her clothes this morning and they did not ask me to stay to see her go. :(

Long day. I'm so going to crash tonight.

Monday

I really, really should be taking a nap. But I'm still washing clothes for my youngest and getting things ready to get up at 5am and get it over to the detention center in time to see her off to the Windsor Pointe Residential Facility.

I found ALL the clothes I've been missing in her bedroom. It only FEELS hot to me 'cause I'm FUMING.

Read Oddity's tarot; then read mine because his came up with a definite problem with lies, deceit and betrayal. I had to know if it could be me. I did NOT like my reading. Suffice to say I'm going to keep a very close eye on what I say and do in the future.

Temptation has pulled away and I pray to the fates he heals.

I truly deeply need a new job.

My son's not shipping out yet; his indiscretions are coming back around to bite him in the ass.

I am going to miss having Oddity around this whole week/weekend. He's on vacation. He'll be far away. He's going to a much needed and much anticipated vacation and this is GOOD.

I'm so tired.