Listening to 80s music, I realize that the 80s may have been a Romantic sort of era, almost in a Byronesque classicism sort of way. I was listening to Corey Hart's "Never Surrender" and wondering idly what my son would think of it, and realizing that his music is harder, harsher, less idealistic and romantic.

My brothers and Capt A and his brother grew up on this 80s theme and consider themselves heroes. When I think of my brother, whom I fondly term 'Terminator', I think of 'Eye of the Tiger'; for my brother the 'Transporter', I can't remember now, but it's something less blatantly heroic and more understated, no less romantic. And.. for some reason.. I think of "Don't Pay The Ferryman" for both of them....

I don't know if there's a song for me that my brothers would have thought of; I know that I have songs for everyone I know. My eldest and her daughter remind me of a song (I won't say it here, because it's their names!) But prior to that, my eldest was "Sister Golden Haired Surprise". My son is "Daniel's Song" and my youngest has two: "Isn't She Lovely?" and one by Savage Garden: "To The Moon & Back" (if you knew the sorrow that was my baby daughter's life, you'd understand).

My eldest thinks of me when she hears the Buggles' song "Elstree". One album, great music - it's the album that "Video Killed The Radio Star" came from. For me, the songs I identified with the most were by Alphaville, Buggles, Kim Wilde; soundtracks were Fame and Streets of Fire.

Right now, I have Ganesha Sharanam by Jai Uttal in my head. New position at work, fulltime. When that one is not playing in my head, my baby daughter's song is ringing; I hope she's okay.


Ah, the whole 'weird music' thing. Today I felt the need for chants. I like the Gregorian Chants, so I have on standby the Noel and the Best of. Then I went to Napster to see what else is out there; found popular music set to chant - in love, I want them all. Beatles and Pink Floyd, Alphaville and Led Zeppelin, all sorts of genres. Then I found the Hindu chants - I'm particularly fond of Ganesha Sharanam, done by Jai Uttal.

Now if I could only find the Islamic worship music; I miss hearing that from the mosque in Bushwick, as brief as that was. I have to find how it would be described to see if I can find it on Napster.

I wish I could find a way to have all this music inside of me whenever I wanted to access it. Like a chip, with limitless space, to add all the world's music to it, so that I can always listen to something. I can cast the song away if I don't like it, or keep it for special memories and occasions. I'm particularly fond of remixes, especially of two completely opposite genres. I adore techno/foreign remixes. And one of the things I like about hip-hop/rap is that they willingly remix and sample things that simply one would not think go together. It fascinating.

It has been a good day.
I find myself enjoying the oddest music. I'm listening to Wumpscut's "Crucified (desert mix)" from Dried Blood of Gomorrah. Let's not go to the instant thrill of listening to something that is entitled "Dried Blood of Gomorrah" or "Crucified" because it is heretical and blasphemous. Terrible thing, that whole 180 from good little church girl to apostate.

Anyway, I enjoy the sounds of Wumpscut - I'm not sure what the genre is really called, industrial or electropop (don't think it's electropop) or what; just like the sounds. I can get lost in the music (my Capn A would not call this music). I feel like I can write things, create things, listening to it.

I escape when I listen to music. At least, my music. Though, I can do that with other people's music so long as they dont talk to me while I'm listening to it.

Walking does that, as does writing. And Reading. Takes me about four hours to finish a book of about 1000 pages if it's scifi/fantasy, and I'm so involved in the story that it is physically jarring to return to real life.

When I listen to Wumpscut, I want to write a soldier's tale, but one that fits my worldview. The soldier is female, but it is not a female bitchfest. She would struggle and complain and fight and deal like a man would; the voice would be unique. I have always liked stories where the woman can only be differentiated from the man by name and body type. She can sweat it out like the boys. Comes from me wanting to be Clint Eastwood in "A Fistful of Dollars". I did, I honestly did!

It would be set in some apocalyptic future, dark yet still hpeful. I love tales of endurance and sheer bravado in the face of horror and danger, and finding out, on the other side, that this experience strengthened hope instead of destroying it.

Yes, the voices in Wumpscut may be male, but the character proclaiming it is female.

For melodrama, I would go to Apoptygma Bezerk and State of the Union and VNV Nation and Wolfsheim. For pain and for terror, Die Form and Rammstein for anger, as NIN as well. Covenant for confusion, and Syntec. Some Icon of Coil, etc.

And this from an old lady. I will never be normal. Thank someone! :)