Written 5/4/2004

I am this woman: bright, cheerful, wise, loving, hurt, torn, shattered, bent, mother, daughter, grandmother, aunt, brave, bereft, bold, brassy, sexy, sensual, moody, chic, strong, fragile, brilliant, tired, capable, hopleless, worn, old. I am this woman, who suffers and grins, loves and loses. Tired of the pain, but life goes on. My mantra. What did I do to deserve betrayal? Be me - generous, loving, full of life and complexity. Intense, yes; perhaps obsessed. Not cowardly, not afraid; but left now with fear and broken hope. My heart is intimate with pain; my soul with hurt. Beauty abounds and I will not shy away from enjoying it. But fear now sits where trust once stood. Look what you did, manchild, cruel creature. Intrinsic in every facet of my life is my heart. I love with all I have. There is no other way for me. And I will not change; the pain remains, but I will not change. The glory of me IS me. I am this woman; be warned. I am Me. Today: 2013 I am more, because I did not allow myself to stay broken, beaten, defeated. There is no such thing. I am me. Diamonds and steel, flesh and blood, heart and soul, greater than my parts. I am me. Be warned, world; whatever you throw my way, I AM ME. And you shall not win.