I cleaned out my desk. And ran headfirst into my memories - of my childhood, of Lord Dragon and The Devil (prior to Lord Dragon) and of Capt A; of my eldest's frightening descent and the fears surrounding it. My childhood, lonely and alienated; The Devil and my lack of self esteem; the Lord Dragon and how I felt about him, and how he betrayed me. Capt A and the way we struggled to keep love alive. My eldest ... I'm afraid of going through the rest of this stuff.. for fear that it will trigger a cryfest.