Didn't bring my mp3 today with me... wanted to see if I was willing to be alone with my own thoughts. I am. It's all good. My neck hurts a bit; bad sleeping posture. I was able to work out all the other body kinks and aches, but my neck's always a bugger. My heels still hurt from the pounding I gave them for Celtic Fling Concert. And the longer I sit on this chair, the worse it hurts when I get up. And I'm soooo cold! This cold makes my aching middleaging body worse. I hate it with a passion but I can't do a damn thing about it other than wear sweaters and scarves and long pants and socks. I wish I could find a job that didn't have air conditioning...

Still looking for work. My fondest desire is to find a perfect job - IN LANCASTER - and just start working there, staying at either Gypsy's or Oddity's for the week and then staying in York on the weekends. The down side to that is that I'm still responsible for Teri.

Ah, we (the social worker and I) had that conversation - why is Teri so low priority. Well, first of all... SHE'S EIGHTEEN YEARS OLD. What can I use to control her behavior??? And then there's the whole acquiescence thing. If she doesn't want to do something and I make her do it, it's bitch, rant, whine, complain and generally make everyone around her miserable. It's why my friends do not want to deal with her coming along on anything. If I deny her something, it's bitch, rant, complain, compare, wheedle, cry, yell and generally making me so miserable I can't be at peace. Or, she's just go off and then I'm responsible.

So work will stay in York, as will I. I am planning on moving Teri up to the attic; the logistics are a little on the staggering side, but I figure that I can move some boxes out of the attic, some boxes can be repacked and stored elsewhere, and some can be tossed because I do collect much junk. But something has to be done; she can't continue this way. She steps on Capt A's toes and mine and it's becoming dreadful. If Teri gets and keeps a job, she can stay in that room. If not, she's outa there.

And all this stresses me out and I don't want to be on meds (another stressor in and of itself). GAH. But at least I'm handling it well right now. Then again, I've been alone for almost 24 hours and that's always good, when I can be alone during daylight hours.

Last night was a trip. After watching Lady in the Water (I liked it!) I debated where to sleep and finally decided to sleep in my own bed in the attic... and so I secured all the windows, took the dogs, the bladed sword, my knives and a heavy steel hammer upstairs so that I had enough to defend myself should anything come up those stairs. I never said I was sane.