I find myself enjoying the oddest music. I'm listening to Wumpscut's "Crucified (desert mix)" from Dried Blood of Gomorrah. Let's not go to the instant thrill of listening to something that is entitled "Dried Blood of Gomorrah" or "Crucified" because it is heretical and blasphemous. Terrible thing, that whole 180 from good little church girl to apostate.

Anyway, I enjoy the sounds of Wumpscut - I'm not sure what the genre is really called, industrial or electropop (don't think it's electropop) or what; just like the sounds. I can get lost in the music (my Capn A would not call this music). I feel like I can write things, create things, listening to it.

I escape when I listen to music. At least, my music. Though, I can do that with other people's music so long as they dont talk to me while I'm listening to it.

Walking does that, as does writing. And Reading. Takes me about four hours to finish a book of about 1000 pages if it's scifi/fantasy, and I'm so involved in the story that it is physically jarring to return to real life.

When I listen to Wumpscut, I want to write a soldier's tale, but one that fits my worldview. The soldier is female, but it is not a female bitchfest. She would struggle and complain and fight and deal like a man would; the voice would be unique. I have always liked stories where the woman can only be differentiated from the man by name and body type. She can sweat it out like the boys. Comes from me wanting to be Clint Eastwood in "A Fistful of Dollars". I did, I honestly did!

It would be set in some apocalyptic future, dark yet still hpeful. I love tales of endurance and sheer bravado in the face of horror and danger, and finding out, on the other side, that this experience strengthened hope instead of destroying it.

Yes, the voices in Wumpscut may be male, but the character proclaiming it is female.

For melodrama, I would go to Apoptygma Bezerk and State of the Union and VNV Nation and Wolfsheim. For pain and for terror, Die Form and Rammstein for anger, as NIN as well. Covenant for confusion, and Syntec. Some Icon of Coil, etc.

And this from an old lady. I will never be normal. Thank someone! :)