I love my kids. They are all adults, and I miss them terribly. They all have their own lives, and the trajectories diverge greatly from each other. I wish my son were near me, and/or my youngest and her husband and son. Perhaps one or both might visit.... My eldest is quite settled at the moment with a good job and her daughter. I do wish she lived near me; I would like to influence my granddaughter more. Added advantage of them being near me is far from the influence of the religion my parents raised me in...

I'm so very tired. I've been burning the candle at both ends for a bit and now am feeling it; plus I really truly hate the cold. To escape the cold, however, would be to leave the few connections I have here, the friends I've made. Yet, I yearn for a day where I'd be accountable to no one, where I could just do whatever I wanted, go wherever I wish, without ever having to refer to anyone else. Most people would call that loneliness (and with good reason); for me, it would almost be heaven (oh, all the books I'd read and wings I'd eat!)

I'll have to make it a point to walk the dog despite the cold. I wear about a pound of clothing just to go out in weather under 50 degrees; and I'm not truly comfortable until the weather's about 80. oh well.

need to write more. perhaps, now is the time. That is, now that the cold has me trapped!