This day's an invitation/And it's just for you/You've got a reservation/For the 17th of June/Open your eyes and let/the sun break in for a while/There may be something/That you've never seen inside (never seen inside) /Feel how your heart beats like a heavy machine/The sound of the traffic is like a far, silent dream/The dust in the park - the exhaust from the cars/Ascends in that heated afternoon -you touch a sweaty body! / Summer in Berlin, it's alright (it's alright)/The day feels so tired/From the lead in the air and the fire in the skies/Life seemed to be a fault of grace but it's ok/It gave you a kiss/In the middle of the crossroads" Summer in Berlin, Alphaville

I got to the bus station just about at 5pm, and Oddity was waiting for me on the 16th. We talked awhile - I had to bring him up to speed on my kids; of course, this pisses everyone off. We got home with some groceries and I started cooking (because that's how I was brought up). We ate dinner and curled up on the couch - I wanted to watch a Love and Rocket video that he has. We cuddled and played around then went to bed. There are things we like doing together that I shan't note here, but we had fun and we slept happy. We should have gotten up early to go to the beach but we took our time and had more fun. I love to make him feel good.

I had the song playing in my head; it is for this reason that I took the 17th off. He offered to take me to Wildwood (where he goes with his mom to vacation every year). The drive was long, but we talked and relaxed and I love to see him in profile. I love to watch him talk, and drive; smile or frown. We got to the beach at about 12 and it was simply GLORIOUS. We had crossword puzzles and music and people watching and talking and holding of hands and ice cream (several times!) and taking sun - I got truly sunburned! - and the only bad thing is that his ear got stuffed up that morning and it was bothering him. I wish I could have taken that for him!

We walked practically the length of the beach AND the broadwalk. He showed me the places he visited when with his mom, and what they did, and the people he met, where he parked, the stores that disappeared, stories about people they see every year, the clubs and how they are migrating to suit the yuppy/college crowd, condo buying et al folks. We watched the scary rides and the water rides and In Between days was playing at some point at the water park area.

We ate at the Lobster Shack - deLIcious! - and just strolled. It was a perfect day, truly, to spend with him. I love being around him to listen to him talk, to speak to him.

On our way home, the conversation again turned to the kids. I know he gets pissed off about them, and I wish I could keep this out of the conversation now. But he cares, and that is endearing. Otherwise, we saw the sun set, a military airplane land (sorta), the full moon rising. We drove past where his mom worked and lived for a while. His auto accident was sometime around late 1990. This and his dad's death figure very large in his life, as does his brother and his mom.

We got home and got ready for bed, but sleep wasn't the first thing on the menu. Again, this was perfect. I can't imagine any better close to a perfect day. And then this morning, the 18th, I made him feel good again - I love doing that. I truly do.

I daydream of moving to Lancaster to be close to him, or learning to drive. When I got home, I did drive A's new Ford Escape to repark it. It is easier the second time around. it really is. I will drive by his birthday. I need to; I need to make progress and break free of my prison.

I love him. I'd give him everything.