I am going to have to stay busy. I get obsessive over my emotional states and this is getting ridiculous. I will chase away the love I want if I can't keep this under control.

I am jealous, why? Because I've suffered in the past. But I have to leave the past behind and just not expect it to all go downhill.

But I do get bitchy about hypocrisy. I have to change, but you don't? Really? I can love you as you are, but you feel that I need to change something because it makes you feel bad... WELL GODDAMMIT SHIT, when do I get to tell you what you do to make me feel bad? When does it MATTER that I feel BAD about something? Don't you dare do to me what Capt A did, set aside my concerns but expect his concerns to be made No. 1.

Do NOT take me for granted.